Is the American Dream Causing Divorce?

There’s a hundred different reasons why people divorce, but in a recent business leader’s breakfast the speaker boiled it down to just one: The Pursuit of Happiness.


Our Declaration of Independence declares that we are endowed by our creator with certain inalienable rights, among which are “Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of Happiness.” The right to pursue happiness is in the DNA of every American.

But we live in a different world than the men did who first wrote this declaration. To them, happiness was defined as freedom from tyranny, and freedom to be self-governed. Happiness was NOT defined as an emotion.

How does this relate to divorce?

When the purpose of your life is to pursue happiness, you base all of your decisions on “will this make me happy?” And if we’re honest, we all walked down the aisle thinking that marriage would make us happy, at least to some degree. But marriage also brings its share of pain.

Divorce is inevitable when your core purpose is to pursue happiness and your marriage is causing you pain.

I’m at that age (mid-thirties) where I’m seeing my peers divorce. People I never would have thought would divorce are splitting up, and it breaks my heart. It’s been said that divorce is more painful than death, because with death, you at least get closure. 

It’s interesting to note that the divorce rate increases with each marriage. First marriages have a 50% chance of divorce, second marriages 67%, and third marriages 74%. In other words, the marriage you are in right now has the highest chance of success than any marriage you could ever have.

We have to learn that the purpose of marriage goes way beyond happiness. And for that matter, the purpose of your life goes way beyond happiness. Happiness is a byproduct of living life right.

Committed to your success,


P.S. How have you bought into the belief that life is about pursuing happiness?



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